tongues ears chest eyes.

1.)
you're a waste of pressure on my chest and blood pounding the walls of my veins;
things that should occur from bliss, euphoria.

alas you cause these subtle senses to intensify not out of joy, but out of the desire to pull my heart from it's encasement and never feel again.

why do i fail to see past these hopeless fool catalysts in my eyes, the shades that blind me from the truth; you're not worth anything I give to you.

each time you break a thread of trust, a fiber of reliability, i love you less and less, but stupid me; i'm far too easily mended.

but mended is temporary, like a string so loosely tied i fall apart repeatedly. to lose one's dignity hurts more than a million needles picking every ligament apart.

i hate you now, and i yearn to hate you forever. to rip your face to shreds in every pretty picture. i'll shatter your twisted smile into tiny off-white shards for you to walk upon.

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2.)
Who needs pictures? constant reminders of fake plastered smiles
on manichean faces with knives in their eyes.
The voices, sounds, clicks of their tongues pulse my eardrum like safety pins.
Oh how I wish to drown them out and suck them dry so their mouth muscles crumble like dust in a vase.
All you happy, set people I found my true calling, I scream whisper.
my voice like a dream where your vocal chords strain nothing but breath.
no sound.
i have no voice.

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3.)
I tell myself today that I can breath on my own, my lungs expand and shrink,
my heart is still a ticking bomb.
I set flame to all our pictures and the wall turned tangerine, i sucked in deep and breathed the smoke and finally felt clean.
you saw the ashes on the ground but never have a clue to anything I mean.

You poor a glass of something red and press your lips against my head.

Here is to giving a shit; as i raise my glass into the air and shatter how i used to care.

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4.)
oh how i despise that song
the one that made my chest twist and stir,
my legs go soft.
the song that swam through my head
tossing its bliss through my brain
with a blazing pulse flow.
the song you seemed to whisper when our lips met.

because now, that immaculate braid of notes and breaths
has corrupted itself to the devil's tongue
licking its poison through my ears.